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Lifestyle - November 16, 2017

Hey Flower, How Are You?

how are you blog post

If  you read my latest blog post, you’ve probably been wondering where the bloody hell I’ve been hiding for the last few weeks…

I come out with something about being more than a P45 (you can read that motivational spiel here) and then disappear like the back of an earring on a grey marl carpet?

Soz, that’s very hyperbolic isn’t it, it’s only been two weeks but I feel the absence fellas and I’ve been desperately trying to find time to sit down and weave a web of words together but it turns out looking for jobs is not just a 9-5. It’s a full time position and I gotta tell ya, I need a PA up in here.

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November 16, 2017
Lifestyle - October 20, 2017

27 Things Every HomeSense Addict Will Understand

27 things every HomeSense addict will understand

There’s a few shops that have a special kind of hold on me. One is Zara, another one is McDonald’s but we won’t talk about that – not here, not like this – and the third is HomeSense. I’m not ashamed to admit that if it came down to spending my last quid on a leccy bill (lol, leccy is such a horrible word. It makes something in my chest shudder in the same way that the word ‘moist’ does) or a book on How To Speak Dog and a candle called Under The Mistletoe, it’s gonna be the latter innit. Which, ironically, makes no sense.

That’s the thing with this place, it makes your home look the tits, but it will also make you lose all your senses. And that guys, is my theory behind the name. Boom.

But who needs sense when you can have a smorgasbord of spooky decor and Himalayan pink salt, eh? It’s every blogger’s wet dream and I don’t intend to wake up from it anytime soon…

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October 20, 2017
Lifestyle - October 4, 2017

Starfish & Coffee Brighton | Cafe Review

Starfish & Coffee review

When a new café opens up in town, I’m like one of those fish in the Amazon. You know the ones that follow a line of urine until it finds the dude’s urethra (bear with me) – reasons not to pee in open water, entry number one.

At the same time, these fish do not discriminate and will happily enter a vagina should it be convenient or the anu… you know what, it doesn’t matter.

Anyway, I’m like one of those fish in some ways but not in others.

Similar in the sense that we both seize new opportunities to feed but immensely different in the sense that I tend to follow a line of coffee or cake, not urine. I’m sure you’ve just let out a huge sigh of relief at that revelation, that’s if you even made it this far.

Well, that was a very unconventional start to a review wasn’t it now? You know how I like to do things a little differently round here (you can also read my review of the Red Roaster, Brighton, here).

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October 4, 2017
Lifestyle - September 28, 2017

5 Things I Have Learned About Blogging So Far

Thing I've learned about blogging

Happy belated birthday bloggy! My humble corner of the interweb just turned a whole year old and I can’t quite believe it. Twelve months of busting my balls – or more specifically, my fingers that now look closer to a gammy pigeon’s foot, mangled by a Coke can – to create content that I feel confident enough to hit publish on.

I’m not saving lives but I am over here looking like a proud mum watching her daughter in the school nativity. Sure, she’s only the ‘little donkey on the dusty road’, but she’s my little donkey.

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September 28, 2017
Lifestyle - September 12, 2017

A Long Weekend In Barcelona

barcelona city break

I could just cut to the chase and tell you we bumbled around Barcelona for three days, hoovering up pizza, doughnuts, tapas and gelato like Hansel and Gretel on roids but I know I need to give you more than that.

But you should know,  I will have to pause for typing breaths here and there along the way because I’m pretty sure I’m still digesting the calamari.

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September 12, 2017